How to "Get Out of Your Head" to Heal With Experiential Therapy

In an earlier article, Healing From the Inside Out: Why Insight Isn't Enough, I discussed how traditional psychotherapy has focused on helping clients to understand and develop intellectual insight into their problems.

How to Get Our of Your Head to Heal With Experiential Therapy

While intellectual insight is an important first step, it's usually not enough to heal and create change (see my article: Why Experiential Therapy is More Effective Than Regular Talk Therapy For Trauma).

As I discussed in the prior article, traditional psychotherapy without the mind-body connection creates intellectual insight into clients' problems, but it often doesn't help with the necessary emotional shift necessary for healing and change.

This is why Experiential Therapy is more effective for healing and change.

What Are the Various Types Experiential Therapy?

Experiential Therapy includes many body-oriented therapies including:

• EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing
  

• AEDP (Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy)

• Somatic Experiencing

• Parts Work Therapy (IFS and Ego States Therapy)

How Does Experiential Therapy Work?

Although each modality is set up in a different way, all Experiential Therapy has certain aspects in common:

• Creating Experiences: Compared to traditional psychotherapy, all Experiential Therapy involves creating experiences to bring about a deeper connection between thoughts and emotions. 

• Emotional Processing: After preparing a client by helping them through the Preparation and Resource Phase, Experiential Therapy allows thoughts, memories and emotions to come to the surface in a deeper way than traditional therapy. Most Experiential Therapists track clients' moment-to-moment experiences so that what comes up is within clients' window of tolerance within the safe environment of the therapist's office. This is important in terms of the work being neither overwhelming nor causing emotional numbing.

Getting Out of Your Head to Heal with Experiential Therapy

• Connecting the Mind and the Body: Experiential Therapy creates a bridge by connecting rational thoughts with deeper emotions, including unresolved trauma. This approach helps to identify and shift unconscious core beliefs (e.g., "I'm unlovable" or "I'm powerless") and patterns that often don't respond to therapy that is more cognitive talk therapy approaches (see my article: Experiential Psychotherapy and the Mind-Body Connection: The Body Offers a Window Into the Unconscious Mind).

• Memory Reconsolidation: By creating new experiences, Experiential Therapy can activate memory reconsolidation, rewiring neural pathways related to traumatic experiences from the past. Memory reconsolidation is essential for transformation (see my article: Riding the Waves From Trauma to Transformation With Experiential Therapy).

What Are the Benefits of Experiential Therapy?

The benefits include:

• Increased Self Awareness: Clients become more attuned to their thoughts and emotions and how these thoughts and emotions interact with their body and behavior (see my article: What is Self Reflective Awareness and Why Is It Important to You?).

• Developing New Skills: With Experiential Therapy clients learn and practice new and healthier ways of coping with stress, managing difficult emotions, resolving conflict and overcoming unresolved trauma.

Getting Out of Your Head to Heal With Experiential Therapy

• Reframing Negative Patterns: Clients learn how to experience situations in new ways by reframing negative thoughts and beliefs. This helps clients to stop harmful patterns from repeating. 

• Enhancing Empathy and Communication Skills: As enhanced empathy and communication skills emerge, clients can improve their relationship with themselves and others (see my article: What is Compassionate Empathy?).

• Providing Stress Relief: The process of engaging with and releasing suppressed emotions and processing unresolved trauma provides stress relief.

Getting Help in Experiential Therapy

If traditional therapy was only partially helpful, you could benefit from working with a licensed mental health professional who uses Experiential Therapy to help you to work through trauma and heal (see my article: What is a Trauma Therapist?).

Getting Out of Your Head to Heal With Experiential Therapy

A skilled Experiential Therapist can help you to complete trauma processing so you can lead a more meaningful life.

Rather than struggling on your own, seek help in Experiential Therapy so you can heal and move on with your life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Somatic Experiencing, Trauma Therapist and Certified Sex Therapist.

I work with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

Hello Impostor Syndrome My Old Friend

Back in 2015 I wrote an article about Overcoming Impostor Syndrome and I'm revisiting this topic today from a personal perspective, which I hope will be helpful to you.

What is Impostor Syndrome?

Impostor syndrome is a psychological experience of feeling like a fraud either in an intellectual or professional setting. 

Impostor syndrome is a subjective experience of self doubt about one's abilities or  accomplishments as compared to others and despite evidence to the contrary.

There is often a fear of being exposed as a fraud. This can include feeling undeserving of success or luck. 

Impostor Syndrome

Although impostor syndrome isn't listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual as a psychiatric diagnosis, it's a real phenomenon.  

It's not a mental disorder--it's a syndrome.

What is Impostor Syndrome For Psychotherapists?

Impostor syndrome often occurs for new therapists or therapists in training at various times in their career when they're learning new skills.

I remember feeling impostor syndrome when I began psychoanalytic training in 1996. 

I was just out of graduate school without much clinical experience, so I felt unprepared to jump into clinical work at the postgraduate clinic where I was assigned clients. 

Just before I met my first client, I felt like I was standing high up on a diving board waiting to dive in. I felt anxious and unprepared. 

As I sat in my newly assigned psychotherapy office, which was the size of a monk's cell, I read over the client's intake which was performed by a graduate student intern.

By the time I finished reading the intake, I felt like I had little to nothing to offer this client who had serious interpersonal problems. 

After reading her intake, I felt a deep feeling of compassion for the client before I even met her.

During that first session, as I listened to the client, I wished she could have been seen by an experienced therapist instead of a beginner like me. But, by the end of the session, she told me she felt the session went very well. She said she felt I was attuned to her--she felt seen and heard by me. She also said she felt my compassion for her and she looked forward to our next session.

During my four years of psychoanalytic training, as I developed therapeutic skills, I felt increasingly more confident, but I still had times when I felt impostor syndrome, which I discovered was common for new therapists.

As I gained clinical experience and with the help of individual and group supervisors, my own personal psychoanalysis, and classes, I discovered I had a natural ability for being a psychotherapist. 

I also realized that no one, no matter how experienced, has all the answers and the point of being a psychotherapist isn't to "fix" clients or to have all the answers (see my article: Why It's Important For Your Therapist Not to Have All the Answers).

What's important is the ability to help clients to become curious and compassionate about themselves so I can guide them to find their own path to healing.

Over the last 30 years as a licensed mental health professional, I have gone on to do many other advanced trainings, including EMDR, AEDP, Somatic Experiencing, EFT Couples Therapy, Sex Therapy and Parts Work (IFS and Ego States Therapy).

I have also learned a lot from my clients by being attuned to them and joining them wherever they were in their healing journey.

I consider myself a curious and compassionate lifelong learner who continues to learn and grow personally and professionally, but I'll never forget my early experiences. 

I have a great deal of empathy for clients and new therapists because I have been both and I know the journey can be challenging, but it can also be very rewarding.

What Are Some Ways to Overcome Impostor Syndrome?

Here are some tips for overcoming impostor syndrome which might be helpful for you:

• Challenge Negative Thoughts: Challenge negative self talk that contributes to impostor syndrome.  Be realistic and remind yourself it's okay to be new at a particular endeavor.

• Remind Yourself of Your Capabilities: You might be new on a particular path, but you probably have evidence of prior success, achievements and positive feedback. Stay curious and open to new experiences.

Self Compassion

• Practice Self Compassion: Know and accept that impostor syndrome is a common phenomenon that many people experience at some point. Treat yourself with kindness and avoid comparing yourself to others.

• Develop a Growth Mindset: A growth mindset will help you to realize you can learn and grow over time. Embrace new challenges as opportunities for growth. Set goals and along the way celebrate your successes.

• Take Action: Don't let impostor syndrome overwhelm you. Although you might be pushed out of your comfort zone, be aware you have overcome other challenges in the past and that moving out of your comfort zone will help you to grow.

• Keep a Journal: Writing about your thoughts and emotions can help you to reflect on where you are in the moment and where you want to be. 

Use Your Imagination

• Use Your Imagination: Using your imagination to visualize yourself to see yourself as already having achieved your goals can be helpful.

• Seek Support: Talk to trusted friends and loved ones. They will probably tell you they have had similar feelings about impostor syndrome at some point in their lives. If possible, join groups where people are having similar experiences and learn how they are coping with these experiences. For instance, before I started graduate school in 1993, I joined a group of people who were working on making various changes in their lives and we were mutually supportive of one another, which was very helpful for me.

About Me:

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I work with individual adults and couples.

As of this writing, I also teach a class, Countertransference and Sex Therapy II, for second year sex therapists in training at the Institute For Contemporary Psychotherapy.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

How Does Somatic Experiencing Heal Trauma?

As a psychotherapist who specializes in helping clients to overcome trauma, I have been using Somatic Experiencing (SE) regularly for 15 years and I have found it to be a highly effective therapy to heal trauma (see my article: What is a Trauma Therapist?).

Somatic Experiencing Can Heal Trauma

How Does Somatic Experiencing Heal Trauma?

Somatic Experiencing, which is an experiential therapy, helps to shift the body's autonomic physical responses by allowing clients to process and discharge "stuck" energy associated with trauma's fight, flight and freeze responses (see my article: Somatic Experiencing: A Mind-Body Oriented Therapy For Overcoming Trauma).

Examples of this include changes in heart rate, blood pressure, digestion, breathing, which are all part of the body's autonomic response system.

"Stuck" or "trapped" energy means the body's instinctive survival response (flight, flight, freeze) to a dangerous event doesn't complete, which leaves excess energy and heightened nervous system arousal stuck in the body. 

This unresolved survival energy can take the form of ongoing health and mental health problems including (but not limited to):

• chronic pain

• anxiety

• emotional numbing 

• muscle tension

• fatigue

• hypervigilance 

• problems with self regulation

Changes in SE are often subtle responses like feeling warmth, tingling or vibrations which indicate the release of trapped trauma-related energy.

A Somatic Experiencing therapist helps to guide clients to notice and track these felt sensations (see my article: What is the Felt Sense?).

Somatic Experiencing therapists also use pendulation to help clients shift their awareness from challenging emotions to a sense of calm so they can gradually process and integrate traumatic experiences (see my article: Coping With Emotional Distress By Using Pendulation in SE).

Understanding interoceptive and proprioceptive sensations is also part of the skill building clients learns in SE.

Interoceptive sensations are the sensations within your body, like the sensations mentioned above: heart beating, muscles tensing or feeling hungry or thirsty. As part of a traumatic experience, these sensations can become hyperactivated which leads to constant anxiety or discomfort.

Proprioceptive sensations is your body's sense of where its different parts are in space and how they are moving. Trauma can disrupt proprioceptive sensations which can make you feel disconnected from certain parts of your body.

SE can change these trauma-related disruptions to restore the natural rhythms of your nervous system that became dysregulated by the trauma.  

Along the way, you learn embodied awareness so you feel more connected to your body and bodily sensations instead of feeling overwhelmed by them. This can lead to the transformation of intense and distressing sensations to a greater sense of well-being and safety.

What Are the Benefits of Somatic Experiencing?

As an experiential therapyp, Somatic Experiencing integrates body awareness into the therapeutic process which makes it unique compared to other non-experiential therapies like regular talk therapy (see my article: Why is Experiential Therapy More Effective Than Regular Talk Therapy to Overcome Trauma?).

Somatic Experiencing Can Heal Trauma

As mentioned above, Somatic Experiencing can help to release trauma which can bring the body back into a regulated state.

Somatic Experiencing can be used as a primary therapy or it can be integrated with other forms of experiential therapy including:

• EMDR

• AEDP

• Hypnotherapy

• Parts Work Therapy, like IFS and Ego States Therapy 

    See my article: Integrating EMDR and Somatic Experiencing

Getting Help in Therapy to Overcome Trauma

As a trauma therapist, Somatic Experiencing is one modality I use either alone or in combination with other types of experiential therapy (see my article: Why Experiential Therapy is More Effective Than Regular Talk Therapy).

I work in a collaborative way with clients to help them to decide which modality or combination of modalities would be best for their particular needs.

Getting Help in Therapy to Overcome Trauma

If you have been struggling with unresolved trauma, you could benefit from seeking help from a Somatic Experiencing therapist.

Freeing yourself from your traumatic history can help you to lead a more fulfilling life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I work with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

What Are the Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions?

As a psychotherapist, I work with individual adults and couples to help them to experience and express their emotions in healthy ways.

The Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions

What Are the Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions?

The following are some of the benefits of allowing yourself to experience your emotions:

• Increased Self Awareness: Emotions offer a guide to important information about your needs, experiences and triggers. When you allow yourself to experience your emotions, you gain a deeper understanding of yourself.

• Better Mental Health: Suppressing emotions can contribute to stress, anxiety and depression. Also, when you suppress uncomfortable emotions, these emotions tend to come back in a stronger way. So, suppressing emotions makes the experience worse. Experiencing emotions can help to ease stress, anxiety and depression.

• Increased Confidence: Expressing your emotions is a vulnerable act which takes courage. By being courageous and expressing yourself, you can increase your confidence.

The Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions

• A More Balanced Perspective: People who express their emotions in a healthy way tend to have a more balanced perspective.

• Better Physical Health: Suppressing emotions can have a negative impact on your immune system and cardiovascular system. In addition, experiencing emotions can help to improve your overall physical health.

• A Deeper Connection in Your Relationship: Openly expressing emotions in a healthy way can help to increase emotional vulnerability, which can help you and your partner to deepen your connection. This can lead to a stronger, more meaningful relationship (see my article: Learning to Embrace Your Emotional Vulnerability).

• Improved Communication: Sharing your emotions in a healthy way provides clarity and context making it easier for you to express your needs and build empathy.

• Increased Trust: Emotional authenticity can help to increase trust in your relationships.

How Can Therapy Help You to Identify and Express Your Emotions?

As a psychotherapist, I work in an experiential way (see my article: Why is Experiential Therapy More Effective Than Regular Talk Therapy?).

The Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions

Many of us weren't taught to identify and expression emotions. On the contrary, some of us were actively discouraged from expressing emotions which gives the message that emotions are dangerous (see my article: How Experiential Psychotherapy Can Facilitate Emotional Development in Adult Clients).

The reality is that everyone experiences emotions and, as mentioned above, there are many benefits to experiencing and expressing your emotions.

Psychotherapy with a therapist who works in an experiential way provides the following benefits:

• A Confidential and Nonjudgmental Environment: Being able to identify and express your emotions in a confidential and nonjudgmental environment is essential for emotional healing (see my article: The Holding Environment: Maintaining a Safe Environment For the Client).

• Attuned and Compassionate Listening: A therapist who works in an experiential way attunes to her clients and listens with compassion. She also validates your emotions which allows you to be more emotionally vulnerable and deepen your understanding of yourself (see my article: The Healing Potential of the Therapist's Empathic Attunement).

The Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions

• Help to Identify Suppressed Emotions: Experiential therapists can help you to understand emotions you have been suppressing, possibly for a lifetime, so you can become more self aware (see my article: How to Manage Your Emotions Without Suppressing Them).

• Improved Emotional Vocabulary: If you had to suppress certain emotions in your family of origin, you might not have developed the necessary vocabulary to express yourself. Developing emotional vocabulary can increase your confidence.

• Improved Coping and Emotional Regulation Skills: An experiential therapist can help you to learn better coping skills and emotional regulation by helping you to develop tools and strategies. This tools include:

• Breathing exercises
  

• Mindfulness practices
  

• Grounding exercises

• Increased Awareness of Emotional Patterns: An experiential therapist can help you to become more aware of your recurring emotional patterns. When you have developed self awareness about these patterns, you can develop the necessary skills to make changes.

What Are Experiential Therapies?

The following are some of the experiential therapies that I use in my private practice:

• EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy)

The Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions

• Somatic Experiencing

• AEDP (Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy)

• Clinical Hypnosis (also known as Hypnotherapy)

• Parts Work Therapy (IFS and Ego States Therapy)

Getting Help in Experiential Therapy

Whether you want to work on developing emotional intelligence or overcoming unresolved trauma, you could benefit from working with a licensed mental health professional who is an experiential psychotherapist.

The Benefits of Experiencing Your Emotions

A skilled experiential therapist can help you to develop the skills and strategies you need.

Rather than struggling alone, seek help in experiential therapy so you can lead a more fulfilling life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (couples therapist), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I work with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

What is Trauma-Related Masking?

Masking is a trauma-related response where individuals hide their true personality, feelings or behavior and mimic others as a maladaptive coping strategy to present a false self.

Trauma-Related Masking

One of the problems with masking, which is also known as social camouflage, is that it creates a disconnect from an individual's true self or genuine self. 

Another problem is that it doesn't allow for genuine connections with others.

Why Causes Trauma Masking?

Childhood trauma can create deeply rooted feelings of:

• Fear
• Shame
  
• Guilt
• A sense of being unworthy or being unlovable

Masking these and other feelings temporarily helps individuals to deal with social situations where they feel too much stress and anxiety to be themselves. 

What Does Masking Look Like?

Masking can include some or all of the following:

• Suppressing feelings
• Hiding aspects of one's personality
• Trying to mimic other people to act in a way that they think is acceptable to others

Clinical Vignette

The following clinical vignette, which is a composite of many cases, illustrates how an individual with a traumatic history uses masking and how trauma therapy can help.

Jane

When Jane left her parents' home to go to college, she felt anxious about meeting new people in college.

Throughout elementary school, middle school and junior high school, Jane only had one or two friends who made an effort to befriend her. She never invited any of these friends home because her father was usually drunk and her mother was depressed so Jane felt too ashamed to allow anyone into her home.

When she met her roommates at college, Jane felt too self conscious to allow her guard down so she tried to imitate their way of speaking and behaving because she believed this is what she had to do to be accepted.

Trauma-Related Masking

Then, one day one of the roommates, Rita, told Jane she realized that Jane was uncomfortable. She told Jane she wanted to have a genuine friendship with her, but she felt Jane wasn't being herself and she encouraged her to be herself.

At first, Jane pretended she didn't know what Rita was talking about. But a couple of weeks later, Jane confided in Rita that she had been pretending and she felt disconnected from herself for so long that she wasn't even sure who she was anymore. 

Soon after that Jane decided to see one of the counselors in the student counseling unit and the counselor was able to help Jane to cope with her anxiety and shame.  She also helped Jane to get help from a trauma therapist off campus.

The trauma therapist got a detailed family history from Jane and asked her about her goals for therapy. Jane told her that she was tired of trying to hide who she was and she wanted to learn to feel comfortable with herself.

Her therapist explained the concept of masking and this explanation resonated with Jane.  She realized she had been pretending to be someone else her whole life because she was afraid people wouldn't like her. 

Her therapist worked with Jane by helping her to feel emotionally safe in therapy and they didn't start to process Jane's traumatic history until Jane felt prepared to do the work (see my article: Why Establishing Emotional Safety is Essential in Trauma Therapy).

When Jane was ready, she and her therapist used EMDR Therapy and Somatic Experiencing to help Jane to process her traumatic history.

The work wasn't quick or easy but, over time, Jane began to feel like herself. She no longer felt the need to pretend to be someone else. She gradually let her guard down and she realized that people liked her for who she really was and not who she was pretending to be. 

Even more important, Jane accepted herself for who she really was and she felt good about it.

How to Overcome Trauma-Related Masking

• Self Awareness: Self awareness is the first step to overcoming trauma-related masking (see my article: What is Self Reflective Awareness?).

Overcoming Trauma-Related Masking

• Self Compassion and Self Acceptance: Self compassion can be challenging due to shame, fear and guilt, but it's a necessary step on the way to healing trauma (see my article: Acceptance and Self Compassion).

• Trauma Therapy: Trauma-related masking is difficult to overcome on your own, so getting help in trauma therapy is an important part of healing.

Getting Help in Trauma Therapy

Hiding behind a mask can be emotionally exhausting and lonely.

As mentioned earlier, you're not just emotionally disconnected from others, you become emotionally disconnected from yourself.

Getting Help in Trauma Therapy

A skilled trauma therapist can help you to work through unresolved trauma so you no longer feel the need to mask your true self.

Rather than struggling on your own, seek help from a licensed mental health professional to free yourself from your traumatic history and live a meaningful life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I have over 20 years of experiencing helping individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

The Anxiety of Waiting For the Other Shoe to Drop Due to Unresolved Trauma

A history of unresolved trauma can affect your outlook on life (see my article: How Trauma Therapy Can Help You to Overcome Unresolved Trauma).

Even when people, who had childhood trauma, overcome adversity and they are no longer struggling under traumatic circumstances in their current life, they can often experience anticipatory anxiety about the future--like they're waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Unresolved Trauma and Anxiety

Many people who haven't had a traumatic childhood can experience this type of anticipatory anxiety after dealing with trauma in adulthood.

Clinical Vignettes

The following clinical vignettes, which are composite cases to protect confidentiality, illustrate how unresolved trauma can create a sense of anticipatory anxiety and foreboding about the future--like waiting for the other shoe to drop:

Sara: Unresolved Trauma and Anxiety

• Sara: When Sara was seven years old, her father's job loss plunged the family into dire financial straits. While her father looked for work, her mother took three jobs just to meet the family's basic needs. Her parents had so much shame about their financial situation that they made Sara promise not to talk about it with anyone outside their immediate family. It took her father two years to find another job that could support the family and, eventually, they were financially stable again. But Sara was profoundly affected by these childhood experiences. As an adult, she had a persistent sense that, at any moment, her circumstances could change and she could experience financial ruin. When her company began layoffs, even though she was assured by her manager that she would be spared, she became so anxious that she sought help in therapy to overcome her anxiety and unresolved trauma (see my article: Why is Unresolved Trauma From the Past Affecting You Now?)

John: Unresolved Trauma and Anxiety

• John: John sought help in therapy after he was treated for prostate cancer. Even though his doctor assured him that he had an excellent chance of living a long healthy life after John was cancer free for two years, John had persistent anxiety about the possibility of the cancer coming back or that he would experience another serious medical problem. Prior to his cancer diagnosis, John had experienced episodes of anxiety whenever he had to make major changes in his life. With regard to his family history, he told his therapist that his mother was an extremely anxious person due to her own unresolved childhood trauma. His mother had a terrible sense of foreboding whenever the family encountered even the possibility of change. When John's father was told his company might relocate down South, his father and mother knew they didn't want to move out of New York City,  so he began looking for another job immediately. John's father wasn't worried about finding a comparable job because he was a much sought after professional. But John's mother became so anxious because she recalled her own family's need to flee from a fascist regime.  Her sense of worry made her sick. Fortunately, the father was able to find another job at a higher paying salary within a relatively short period of time. But the mother continued to experience persistent bouts of anxiety and foreboding. While he was in therapy, John learned the connection between his anxiety and his mother's unresolved trauma (see my article: What is Intergenerational Trauma?).

Ellen: Unresolved Trauma and Anxiety

• Ellen: After Ellen's best friend, Alice, died suddenly from natural causes, Ellen felt like her world was completely shaken. She had never lost anyone close to her and Ellen felt existential dread about the possibility of her own death. Prior to Alice's death, Ellen would have occasional worries about death--even though Ellen was in excellent health. Although she had other close friends, Ellen felt lost without Alice, who had been her best friend since they were in elementary school. After listening to Ellen talk about her grief and her anxiety for a few months, her friends became impatient with her and told her she needed to "move on." But Alice didn't know how to move on. She didn't even know how to mourn. When Ellen sought help in therapy, she told her therapist she had a great childhood, she had loving parents, she had a loving husband and two wonderful adult children. There was no prior trauma in her history that seemed to be getting triggered. Her feeling that any moment the other shoe would drop was related to the loss of Alice, so her therapist helped Ellen to grieve and Ellen felt comfort in being able to process her loss in therapy without any of the judgment she experienced with her friends. After she completed therapy, Ellen felt she had the usual concerns that middle age people have about death, but her concerns didn't feel as catastrophic as they had been when Alice first died. Even though she felt better, she realized that she was forever changed by the loss of her best friend. But with help from her therapist, Ellen began to look forward to upcoming events in her life in a way she wasn't able to do immediately after Alice's death (see my article: Allowing Room For Grief).

Conclusion

In each of the composite vignettes the clients were affected by past or recent unresolved trauma so that they were apprehensive--even when it was clear that there was no need to worry about their current situation.

Traumatic events can create feelings of anticipatory anxiety and foreboding--even when a person's logical mind tells them that there seems to be no apparent reason for these feelings under their present circumstances.

Even though these experiences are common, people who have never experienced anything like this before might not understand. 

Well-meaning friends and family might tell you to "just get over it" or to "move on" and when you can't "move on", they might be surprised or even judgmental. 

Getting Help in Trauma Therapy

If you have unresolved trauma that causes you to experience feelings of anxiety and foreboding, you could benefit from working with a trauma therapist (see my article: What is a Trauma Therapist?).

Getting Help in Trauma Therapy

A skilled trauma therapist can help you to work through unresolved trauma using therapy modalities specifically designed to help clients overcome trauma.

These modalities include (but are not limited to):

• EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) Therapy

• AEDP (Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy)

• Somatic Experiencing (also known as S.E.)

• Parts Work Therapy (including IFS and Ego States Therapy)

• Hypnotherapy (also known as Clinical Hypnosis)

Rather than struggling on your own, seek help from an experienced trauma therapist so you  can overcome trauma and lead a more fulfilling life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Parts Work, Somatic Experiencing and Sex Therapist.

I have over 20 years of experiencing helping individual adults and couples to overcome trauma.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742- 2624 during business hours or email me.