Cinema Therapy: How Can Watching Movies Improve Your Mental Health?

Watching movies with complex characters can be beneficial to your mental health. The practice known as cinema therapy (also known as movie therapy) is a growing therapeutic technique which uses the narrative arc and depth of films to foster psychological growth.

Cinematherapy Can Improve Your Mental Health

When you engage in multi-layered, three-dimensional characters, rather than flat, predictable archetypes, it stimulates specific cognitive and emotional processes that can directly support well being.

Watching complex characters can benefit your mental health through several key mechanisms:

Safe Emotional Distance and Projection

Discussing or processing your own personal pain can sometimes make you feel vulnerable  under certain circumstances. In cinema therapy complex characters in a movie provide an emotional buffer that includes:

• Safe Exploration: You can project your own fears, unvoiced struggles or internal conflicts onto a character.

Cinematherapy Can Improve Your Mental Health

• Objective Detachment: This allows you to process intense themes, including grief, trauma or confusion, with enough distance to evaluate them objectively without flooding your nervous system.

Catharsis and Emotional Regulation
Bottled up feelings can lead to anxiety and pent up stress.  Complex stories act as an emotional pressure valve:

• Controlled Release: Watching a character face existential dilemmas or deep emotional pain provides a structured container that invites you to laugh, cry or feel anger in a safe way.

• Neurochemical Reset: This cathartic release can trigger a drop in cortisol and an increase in dopamine which can lower physical and emotional tension.

Cognitive Flexibility and Shattering Binary Thinking

Flat characters teach us to view the world in black-and-white terms (good vs evil). Complex, morally ambiguous characters force your brain to stretch:

• Brain Activation: Neuroimaging studies show that watching complex characters activates the parts of the brain that handle perspective-taking and the management of cognitive conflict.

• Nuanced Realism: Seeing a character who is deeply flawed yet capable of profound kindness helps you to reject harsh, binary judgments about yourself and others, which builds tolerance for life's natural ambiguities.

Building Inner Resources and Resilience
When characters navigate complicated psychological terrain, they model coping mechanisms and self discovery:

• Inner Resources: Watching a character struggle to find their authentic self amidst social pressure or personal crisis can awaken forgotten internal resources and coping skills as well as help to build resilience.

Cinematherapy Can Improve Your Mental Health

• Active Reflection: It inspires post-viewing reflection, which is the mental integration that happens after watching the movie. It can help you to apply the character's breakthroughs and gained wisdom to your own life.

Universal Experiences and Reduced Isolation

A core part of many mental health problems is that you feel alone with your experience and that no one else has ever experienced what is happening to you, so watching movies with complex characters helps you to realize you're not alone:

• Validating the "Hidden Self": Complex cinematic portrayals capture the messy realities of the human condition. An example of this is putting on a happy public persona while struggling on the inside (see my article: Looking Happy on the Outside But Feeling Broken on the Inside).

Cinematherapy Can Improve Your Mental Health

• The Power of Shared Humanity: Seeing those hidden, complicated parts of yourself reflected on the screen helps you to realize that many problems are universal. This can help you to realize that your struggles are a normal part of being a human being.

How Does a Psychotherapist Use Cinema Therapy in Therapy Sessions?

A psychotherapist uses cinema therapy (or movie therapy) as an emotional bridge to help clients to discuss personal issues. 

The therapist uses a structured framework where clients watch the movie, discuss the movie and process their own real-life experiences which are similar to what the characters dealt with in the film.

How Therapists Use Cinematherapy With Clients

Talking about fictional characters can feel less threatening than if clients talk directly about their problems. 

The therapist will often ask questions like, "Why do you think the main character made that choice?" or "What would you have done in this character's place if you had the same dilemma?"

The therapist can also explore with clients what it was like to watch the movie and to realize they aren't the only ones who have these types of problems. 

They also ask questions like "Would you have handled this problem in the same way or in a different way?"

After clients have processed their thoughts and feelings about the movie with the therapist, the therapist can also ask what it was like to discuss the movie with her. This is called metaprocessing.

This can help clients to open up to discuss their own problems and reflect on their therapeutic relationship with the therapist.

What Kind of Movies Can Help to Improve Your Mental Health

There are so many movies that can be beneficial.

Here is one example that can be beneficial for individuals and couples to watch:

The Before Trilogy: The Before Trilogy is a highly acclaimed series of three romantic dramas by Richard Linklater and starring Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy. The three films in the trilogy are:

• Before Sunrise (1995)
• Before Sunset (2004)
• Before Midnight (2013)

The trilogy follows the evolving relationship between an American man named Jesse and a French woman named Celine. This series, which was filmed in real time over several years, is famous for its naturalistic conversation-driven format.

What Can You Learn From Watching the Before Trilogy? (No spoilers)

The Before Trilogy teaches that long term relationships require active continuous choices rather than relying only on romantic fate:

• Love changes over time
• Communication predicts survival of the relationship
• Love requires constant effort
• Time can alter your perspective

When I assign this trilogy to watch over a period of a few weeks, I use the films to help the client reflect on their personal struggles and how the characters in the movie dealt with similar struggles.

If I assign it to a couple, I ask them to watch the movies and discuss it afterward in terms of the characters and the dilemmas the characters faced in an effort to stimulate deeper communication between them and a deeper understanding of their relationship.

Conclusion

Cinema therapy is an expressive therapeutic modality where a mental health professional assigns a certain movies to help clients process emotions, gain new perspectives and heal. Therapists can also use TV programs or other types of videos.

Cinema therapy works by using carefully selected movies as a "third person" tool to mirror real-life struggles, encourage empathy and prompt breakthroughs.

It can be beneficial for individual adult clients or couples.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), IFS and Ego States Parts Work, Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist

I have helped many individual adults and couples over the years.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

What is the Difference Between Psychotherapy and Psychiatry?

Psychotherapy and psychiatry sound alike, so it can be confusing to know what the differences are and when to see a psychotherapist versus when to see a psychiatrist.

The Difference Between Psychotherapy and Psychiatry

What is the Difference Between a Psychotherapy and Psychiatry?

While the two terms might sound interchangeable, there are important key differences:

Psychotherapy

Psychotherapists tend to focus on thoughts, including unconscious thoughts, emotions and behavior.

The Difference Between Psychotherapy and Psychiatry

Psychotherapists have at least a two year Masters degree and many of them also have an additional four years postgraduate training from postgraduate institute (like the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy, National Institute of Psychotherapies and other institutes).

Aside from traditional talk therapy, psychotherapists who go on for advanced training also provide specialized therapy including (but not limited to):

• Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)

• Internal Family Systems Parts Work (IFS)

• Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP)

• Somatic Experiencing

• Hypnotherapy

• Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy

• Sex Therapy (for individuals and couples)

Depending upon their skills and training, many psychotherapists can help clients to:

• Manage Stress and Anxiety

• Overcome Depression

• Develop Resilience and Better Coping Skills

Couples Therapy

• Improve Relationships

• Process Unresolved Issues, including Unresolved Trauma

• Improve Communication Skills

• Cope with Workplace Issues

• Process Unresolved Grief

• Improve Self Esteem

And many other behavioral and interpersonal issues.

Most psychotherapy sessions occur at least once a week for 45-60 minutes.

Psychiatry

Psychiatry focuses on the medical side of mental health.

Psychiatrists are mental health professions who are medical doctors (MDs or DOs). They provide differential diagnoses, prescribe psychotropic medication such as antidepressants, anti-anxiety medication, antipsychotic medication and other similar medications.

In the past, psychiatrists provided traditional psychotherapy, like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), psychoanalysis and psychodynamic psychotherapy. However, these days most psychiatrists provide medication management. 

Some specialized psychiatrists also provide Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) for severe mental health conditions such as treatment-resistant major depression, ADHD, schizophrenia and  catatonia (a state where someone is awake but unresponsive to other people or the environment).

After the initial evaluation session, psychiatry sessions tend to be shorter in duration (15-20 minutes) to assess how a client is responding to medication management. After a client has been stabilized on medication, sessions might occur every 3-4 months unless the client needs help with medication.

Integrating Psychotherapy and Psychiatry

Clients, who need medication management, benefit from integrating both psychotherapy and psychiatric treatment and many psychotherapists and psychiatrists collaborate to integrate both treatments (see my article: Medication Alone Isn't As Effective As Including Psychotherapy).

For instance, a psychotherapist who is helping a client with anxiety will often be in touch with the client's psychiatrist to provide feedback on what she has observed in therapy sessions and to get information about medications prescribed. This is only done with a written consent from the client.

While some clients choose to only take medication, research has shown that combining psychotherapy and psychiatric treatments is most effective (when psychiatric treatment is needed) rather than just relying on medication because clients learn coping skills and strategies to deal with their mental health issues. 

Psychotherapy can get to the underlying issues that cause the mental health issues and if worked through in therapy, it's possible that medication won't be necessary for certain clients. 

In addition, when clients stop taking medication for certain mental health issues, they often go back to having the same problems they had before they took medication. For instance, if they never learned to manage anxiety symptoms or get to the root cause of their anxiety in therapy, once they stop taking the medication, they are back to where they were before they stopped taking the medication.

At the same time, there are certain mental health conditions that require medication such as schizophrenia, some forms of ADHD or bipolar disorder to mention just a few.

How to Choose Between Psychotherapy and Psychiatric Treatment

Making a decision about mental health treatment can be a big step, especially if you are new to it.

Consider what you need:

Are you looking for help with understanding yourself, improving your relationships, dealing with situational anxiety or working on unresolved trauma or are you dealing with more complex long-standing psychiatric problems?

If you are dealing with a mental health issue that requires medication (e.g., ADHD, bipolar disorder), starting with a psychiatrist is a good first step. Then, once you are stabilized on medication, you can see a psychotherapist to help you to make the behavioral changes that medication alone won't do.

How to Discover What is Right For You

It's easy to get confused about the differences between psychotherapy and psychiatry.

The Difference Between Psychotherapy and Psychiatry

You're not a broken machine that needs to be "fixed". You're a human being which means that, like everyone else, you have messy, complicated and wonderful parts of yourself. We all do.

Rather than focusing on being "perfect", the goal is developing a better understanding of yourself, practicing self compassion, finding the right tools and strategies to deal with life's inevitable ups and downs and living a meaningful life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Parts Work (IFS and Ego States Therapy), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I have helped many individual adults and couples over the years.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

Also See My Articles:

Why is Experiential Therapy Better Than Traditional Talk Therapy to Deal With Trauma? 

With Experiential Therapy, There Are No Blank-Slate Therapists 

The Mind-Body Connection: Experiential Therapy Offers a Window Into the Unconscious Mind 

Debunking Common Myths About Depression

Depression is one of the most common diagnoses in the United States and, yet, it's a diagnosis that is still poorly understood with many misconceptions (see my article: What is the Difference Between Sadness and Depression?).

Debunking Common Myths About Depression

According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), more than 21 million people had at least one depressive episode in 2020. However, people who are depressed continue to be stigmatized because misconceptions about depression persist.

What Are the Symptoms of Depression?

Depression symptoms involve a persistent low mood or loss of interest in activities lasting two weeks or more as well as some or all of the symptoms mentioned below.

The following are among the symptoms that can be depression, but a differential diagnosis must be made by a skilled mental health professional:

• Feeling Down or Empty: A feeling that does not go away
• Loss of interest in activities that were enjoyable before: Anhedonia
• Hopelessness/Pessimism: A bleak outlook about the future
• Feelings of Worthlessness/Guilt: Intense feelings of failure or self blame
• Irritability and Restlessness: Particularly common in men
• Suicidal Thoughts: Thoughts of death or self harm
• Fatigue: Extreme lack of energy or feeling "slowed down"
• Appetite/Weight Changes: Significant weight loss or weight gain; increased or decreased appetite
• Physical Pain: Headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not improve with treatment
• Reduced Concentration: Difficulty focusing, remembering or making decisions
• Social Isolation: Withdrawing from friends and loved ones

Symptoms in Different Groups:

Men: Men are more likely to show anger, irritability, aggression and more likely to engage in high-risk activities.

Debunking Common Myths About Depression

Women: Women may experience symptoms related to menstrual cycles (e.g., Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder)

Children/Teens: Children and teens may exhibit irritability, outbursts or poor performance in school--although some children and teens don't exhibit these symptoms.

When to Seek Help Immediately

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, seek help immediately by calling 911 or going to your nearest emergency room.

Common Myths About Depression Debunked

• Depression Isn't All in Your Head: Depression is a biological, social and psychological disorder. It can be chronic and requires psychological treatment. 

• Depression Isn't Only Brought On By a Traumatic Event: A traumatic event isn't necessarily the cause of depression. For example, while experiencing grief is common, someone who is depressed can experience symptoms for a longer period of time than someone who has a loss but who isn't depressed. 

• Medication Alone Doesn't Always Help Depression: The best combination of treatment is often a combination of psychotherapy and, if needed, medication.

Debunking Common Myths About Depression

• You Can't Just "Snap Out of It": Depression isn't a choice. You can't just "snap out of it" with positive thinking (see my article: What is Toxic Positivity?).

• Depression Doesn't Look the Same For Everyone: There is no one-size-fits-all experience of depression. Each person can have different symptoms and a different experience.

• Depression Isn't the Same as Feeling Sad: Feeling sad and being depressed are two different things. Feeling sad or "down" usually doesn't last as long as a depressive episode. 

• Depression Isn't a Sign of Weakness: Anyone can experience depression. Depression is a biological and psychological condition that has nothing to do with being "weak" or "strong".

• Talking About Depression Doesn't Make It Worse: Working with a skilled mental health professional can help to provide clarity and hope. Silence perpetuates the stigma against depression and can increase feelings of isolation.

Note: The purpose of this article is only to provide information. For medical advice or diagnosis, consult a mental health professional who has an expertise in working with individuals who experience depression.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Somatic Experiencing, Parts Work (IFS and Ego States Therapy) and a Certified Sex Therapist.

I have helped many individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

Grieving For a Parent Who Wasn't There For You

Grief for a deceased parent isn't always related to how close you were.

Grieving For a Parent Who Wasn't There For You

In fact, grief related to the loss of a parent you weren't close to can be even more intense than grief for a nurturing parent because it often involves grieving for what  you hoped for and never got (see links for my articles about grief below).

For adults who have lost a parent under these circumstances, part of the grief is knowing that the warm loving relationship you might have wished for can never be experienced after your parent died. The death can bring a painful finality to your wish and wash away any hopes you might have had to improve the relationship.

Clinical Vignette:

The following clinical vignette is a composite of many different cases with all identifying information removed:

Alex

Alex was in his mid-30s when he received a phone call from his stepmother, a woman he had never met, telling Alex that his father had terminal cancer. She told him that his father was in hospice and he wasn't expected to live more than a few days.

Before Alex could respond, his stepmother put his father on the phone to say a few words. It was clear to Alex that his father was heavily medicated and Alex didn't know what to say. His father asked for Alex's forgiveness for walking out on Alex and Alex's mother more than 30 years ago. He said he regretted not ever contacting Alex after he walked out on them.

Alex was shocked and confused. He didn't want to reject his father's dying wish, so he told his father that he forgave him. Then, his stepmother got back on the phone and told Alex that his father was too weak to talk any more. Before she hung up,she told Alex she would keep him apprised.

Not knowing what else to do, Alex sat for several minutes to take in what had just happened. When he was a child, he would ask his mother where his father had gone and his mother would tell him that his father was away on a business trip. But as weeks turned into months and years, Alex realized his father wasn't returning and he never asked his mother about it again because he didn't want to upset her.

Alex buried his feelings about his father and tried not to think about him. But there were times in his life when Alex felt sad that his father wasn't there for him, like when he graduated high school, when he graduated college, when he got married and when he had his first child. But during those times he didn't allow himself to dwell on those thoughts.

By the next day, Alex thought he might want to go visit his father before his father passed away, but then he received another call from his stepmother that his father died that night. She said she planned to have a memorial service in a few months and invited Alex to attend and meet his half brother, Jack.

A wave of profound sadness came over Alex. His wife attempted to soothe him, but Alex was too confused, anxious and angry to talk about it. He never even knew he had a half brother.

His wife said to him, "But you haven't seen your father in so many years and you don't even remember him. So, why do you feel sad?"

Alex couldn't explain why he felt so many mixed emotions, but after weeks passed and he didn't feel any better, he got help in therapy.

Grieving For a Parent Who Wasn't There For You

His therapist helped Alex explore his feelings and he realized that, even though he didn't allow himself to dwell on being abandoned by his father, he always had a wish that he and his father would reunite and they would develop a strong father-son relationship. But now that his father was dead, the reconciliation was impossible and this made him feel deeply sad.

His therapist helped Alex to grieve the abandonment and the loss of a relationship he wished for but now would never have. He also worked on his anger about his father asking him as he was dying to forgive him because, even though Alex said he forgave him, he wasn't sure how he felt.

As Alex continued to work on these issues in therapy, he realized how much he had stuffed his feelings from the time he was young because there was no one to help him with his complicated feelings about being abandoned and never seeing his father again. He believed his mother did the best she could, but she wasn't emotionally equipped to help him when he was a child.

After his father's death, when he spoke to his mother, he realized her memories of that time were different from his. She believed she had sat him down, talked to him and comforted him after his father left. When he told her what he remembered, she denied it, so Alex dropped the subject.

The memorial service was several months away and Alex had mixed feelings about going. Part of him wanted to go to meet his half brother and to find out more about his father, but another part of him didn't want to go. Even though he knew logically that none of this was his half brother's fault, he felt hurt and angry that his half brother had the relationship with his father that Alex wanted.

Then one day Alex received a call from his half brother, Jack, and they talked for over an hour. Jack said he could only imagine how difficult it must have been for Alex to get the call from Jack's mother after so many years. He also hoped they could meet and get to know each other.

Over time, they developed a relationship and Alex decided to go to the memorial service.

It took Alex a while to sort out his feelings about his father and his anger about the way his mother lied to him when his father left. But he also felt relieved to release the emotions in therapy--emotions he had suppressed for so many years.

Over time, Alex worked out his grief in therapy and maintained a relationship with Jack.

Getting Help in Therapy

Grieving for a deceased parent is difficult and it can be that much more difficult when a parent hasn't been there for you.

Getting Help in Therapy

Rather than trying to deal with these complicated emotions on your own, seek help from a licensed mental health professional who has experience helping clients with grief and loss.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Parts Work (IFS and Ego States Therapy), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I am an experienced psychotherapist who has helped many individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

Also See My Articles

Mourning the Death of a Father You Never Knew

Common Reactions to the Death of a Loved One 

The Many Layers of Grief 

The Emotional Impact of Losing Both Parents

Who Are You After Both of Your Parents Die?

Writing to Cope With Grief

How to Set Boundaries With Friends If They're Texting You Too Much

There are some people who enjoy texting back and forth with their friends all day long and it's mutually satisfying for all the texters involved.

Setting Boundaries With Friends About Texting

But if you're not one of those people who enjoys constant texting and you have a friend who likes to send you lots of texts, rather than letting resentment and emotional distance grow, you can tactfully set a limit with your friend (see my article: Do You Feel Entitled to Set Boundaries With the People in Your Life?).

In a world where people can reach others in a flash by texting, a lot of people find it gratifying to express their thoughts and feelings in texts and enjoy the dopamine hit when their friends text back.

People who have problems understanding boundaries can text all day long without considering whether the person they're texting has the time and emotional bandwidth to deal with a barrage of texts (see my article: Do You Feel Overwhelmed By Your Friend's Problems?).

If you haven't set a limit, you can give your friend the benefit of the doubt that they might not know you don't like a lot of texts and that you don't have the time or emotional bandwidth for it. Therefore, it's up to you to communicate this to them so you take care of your time and mental health.

Why Do Excessive Texts Create Stress and Anxiety?

Here are some of the most common reasons:

• Pressure to Respond (Expectation of Availability): You might feel pressure to respond immediately. This often leads to stress and anxiety when you can't or you don't want to respond immediately.

• Digital Burnout and Overstimulation: Constant notifications can break concentration. The ongoing distraction can lead to mental fatigue.

• Lack of Personal Space: Excessive non-urgent texts throughout the day can feel like an intrusion on your privacy and downtime.

• Anxiety Trigger: A high volume of text messages can induce anxiety and a feeling of being overwhelmed.

• Disruption to Workflow and Personal Tasks: Constant interruptions can make it difficult to focus on work or personal tasks.

How to Set Boundaries With a Friend Who Texts Too Much

Here are some suggestions that might be helpful:

• Shift the Focus from Their Behavior to Your Own Needs and Boundaries: First, recognize that you have the right to your feelings as well as the right to set boundaries. If you can't set boundaries with others, you're going to feel frustrated and you'll probably have ongoing interpersonal problems due to the lack of boundaries. Assuming you want to maintain this friendship, you can say, "Having to check texts many times per day makes me feel anxious. I'm trying to check these notifications less."

• Express Appreciation For Their Friendship: Assuming you want to maintain this friendship, express your appreciation for your friend and the things you like about them so that you're not just focusing on something that bothers you about their behavior. 

Setting Boundaries With Friends About Texting

• Shift Time Spent With Your Friend From Texts to In-Person Visits: Suggest to your friend that you would like to know what's going on in their life, but you would prefer to do it in person. Then, suggest a time when you're free to meet in person. 

• Let Them Know When You're Available: Let your friend know when you're reachable and manage their expectations about when you're free to respond to texts. You can say something like, "I don't have time to check texts throughout the day, so I only check them after work" or "I've been so busy lately that I haven't had time to check personal texts." Then, as previously mentioned, you can suggest meeting when you're both free.

Setting Boundaries With Friends About Texting

• Let them Know You're "Unplugging" to Manage Your Stress: Let your friend know that, as part of a new lifestyle change, you're taking time to "unplug" from your phone and computer. You can tell them that, as part of your digital detox, you're cutting back on the time you spend reading email and texts. You can also tell them that if they don't hear from you for a few days, this is the reason.  

• Evaluate the Friendship: If your friend doesn't understand that you don't have the time and emotional bandwidth for a lot of texts in a day, you can evaluate whether the aspects you like about this friend outweigh this problem. If you have communicated your boundaries and they don't respect them, there might be other areas where you'll find they will cross your boundaries. At some point, you'll need to decide whether you want this friend in your life.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT (for couples), Parts Work (IFS and Ego State Therapy), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I have over 25 years of experiencing helping individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

How to Support a Friend Who is Depressed

Supporting a depressed friend can be challenging, especially if you don't understand what it means to be depressed, so it can be helpful to familiarize yourself with the symptoms of depression (see my article: What is the Difference Between Sadness and Depression?).

Supporting a Friend Who is Depressed

What is Major Depression?

Major depression is a common serious mood disorder.

Depression isn't just "feeling bad". It's a persistent condition that is often episodic and which usually lasts at least two weeks.

Depression isn't a sign of "weakness." It's a mental health condition that is treatable for most people.

Approximately 8-9% of adults in the U.S. experience at least one episode of major depression in their lifetime.

Approximately 15-20% of children ages 12-17 experience depression in the U.S. (see my article: Adolescent Depression).

There are gender differences with women being twice as likely to experience depression than men in the U.S.

Symptoms can include:

• Intense sadness

• Irritability

• Loss of interest in activities that were once enjoyable

• Problems sleeping

• Feeling worthless

• Problems concentrating

• Poor appetite

• Weight loss

• Possible suicidal thoughts

• Possible intent and plan to commit suicide

What Causes Major Depression?

Major depression is often a combination of genetic and environmental factors including (but not limited to):

• A genetic predisposition for depression

• A traumatic history including:
• Emotional neglect
• Abuse
• Loss of a loved one
• Other losses

• Major life changes including (but not limited to):Moving to a new areRelationship problems
• Separation or divorce
• Children moving out of the house (see my article: Coping With Empty Nest Syndrome)

• Low self esteem

• Pessimism

• Medical conditions

• Substance misuse/abuse

• Financial problems

• Medications

How Can You Help a Friend Who is Depressed?

Supporting a friend who is depressed can be challenging.

Supporting a Friend Who is Depressed

Here are some tips for helping a depressed friend:

• Listen without judgment

• Keep in touch to check in with them

• Offer help including
• Helping with chores
• Running errands
• Offering childcare to give them a break
• Helping with other tasks

• Encourage your friend to get professional help which might include helping them to find a psychotherapist or psychiatrist in their area.

• Be patient and understand that recovery from depression can take a while.

What Should You Not Do?

• Don't say things like "Snap out of it' or "Cheer up" or "You have so much to be grateful for."

• Don't minimize or dismiss their pain by saying, "Things could be worse."

• Don't compare them unfavorably to others (see my article: Comparison and Judgment Are the Thieves of Joy).

• Don't blame them for their depression.

• Don't try to be their psychotherapist. Be their friend.

Take Care of Yourself

Supporting a loved one who is depressed can be physically and emotionally draining 

Self Care

Make sure you have your own friends and support system.

Set boundaries.

Seek help for yourself if you feel overwhelmed by your friend's depression.

About Me

I am a licensed New York psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, Parts Work (IFS and Ego States Therapy), EFT (for couples), Somatic Experiencing and Certified Sex Therapist.

I work with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.

Also see my articles: 

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

Are You Concerned About Your Spouses Depression? 

What is the Connection Between Anxiety and Depression?