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NYC Psychotherapist Blog

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Showing posts with label anticipatory anxiety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anticipatory anxiety. Show all posts

Saturday, October 10, 2026

Overcoming Anxiety About Starting Therapy: Why It’s Normal to Feel Ambivalent

This article was updated on October 10, 2026.
Many people seeking help in psychotherapy are surprised by how much anxiety and ambivalence they experience when beginning to see a psychotherapist. Even the most motivated individuals often feel a wave of hesitation before their first session. 
Minimalist one line art illustration depicting an anxiety-to-calm concept, featuring a tangled chaotic thread transforming into a smooth, peaceful human face. Curated for a Manhattan, NYC psychotherapy article on overcoming anxiety about starting therapy by Josephine Ferraro, LCSW in Greenwich Village (10011).
Minimalist single-line art illustration representing the transition from acute anticipatory anxiety to somatic calm—a therapeutic milestone utilized by Greenwich Village, NYC psychotherapist Josephine Ferraro, LCSW (10011) to help clients navigate ambivalence about starting therapy.
As a licensed psychotherapist practicing in Greenwich Village, Manhattan, I want to assure you that this is a completely normal reaction to beginning the psychotherapeutic process.
Why Do People Feel Anxious About Starting Psychotherapy?
In general, making meaningful changes can be challenging. Even when you consciously know you need support and feel the time is right, stepping into the unknown is daunting.
Most people decide to begin psychotherapy because they want to break old patterns. However, we are familiar with our old habits and ways of being. Even when those ways become uncomfortable or stop working for us, imagining a different version of ourselves brings up deep uncertainties:
  • "How can I actually make these changes?"
  • "Will I be able to sustain it, or will this be another unsuccessful attempt?"
  • "What if my family and friends don't like the changes they see in me?"
It is completely natural for these doubts to creep in. If you have never been in theray before, the psychotherapeutic environment is unlike any other professional relationship you have experienced.
The Pragmatic and Emotional Hurdles of Finding a Therapist
The logistical challenge of finding the right practitioner can amplify your initial anxiety. Navigating insurance panels in NYC is famously frustrating. Many specialized psychotherapists operate private practices outside of managed care panels because insurance constraints often restrict the depth and duration of clinical care.
When searching for a therapist, I highly recommend seeking trusted recommendations from friends or doctors. If you find a clinician who feels like the right fit but does not accept your specific insurance, you might feel conflicted about paying for therapy out of pocket.
When navigating this economic decision, it helps to look at therapy as a foundational investment in your future. Consider how resources are allocated elsewhere—such as dining out in Manhattan or daily impulse buys. Prioritizing your psychological well-being is an investment that yields lifelong dividends.
Once you identify a psychotherapist online or through a referral, making that initial phone call can feel awkward. You might worry about what to say or how to summarize your struggles concisely. If you reach a confidential voicemail, leaving a brief message with your contact details is all it takes to start the process.
Anticipatory Anxiety and the First Appointment
Taking that first step and scheduling an appointment often brings a temporary wave of relief. You have set a clear intention to heal. Yet, as the date approaches, anticipatory anxiety frequently spikes.
It is common to worry about the dynamics of the session:
  • "Will the therapist judge me?"
  • "Will they think my problems aren't real, or conversely, that I'm completely broken?"
Arriving at a Manhattan professional office for the first time can provoke significant vulnerability. However, a skilled clinician knows how to de-escalate this tension, helping you settle into the room so you can use your session in a productive, satisfying, and safe way.
Clinical Vignette: Understanding Ambivalence in Action
The following case study is an anonymized composite drawn from real-world clinical themes. All identifying details have been completely changed to protect client confidentiality.
Daniel's Story: From Panic to Progress
Before Daniel called my office, he had been actively thinking about starting psychotherapy for several years. He had collected names of recommended practitioners from his doctor, but his underlying anxiety continuously blocked him from making the phone call.
When he finally reached out to me, his anxiety was so intense that he forgot to leave his phone number on my voicemail. Recognizing the oversight, he called back and left his details. When I returned his call, I could sense his nervousness, so we spent a few minutes discussing what he hoped to achieve in therapy.
As we spoke, his voice settled. He shared that low self-esteem was severely impacting his personal and work relationships. 
We scheduled a consultation at my office in Greenwich Village, NYC (10011). I provided clear subway directions, explained the building's intercom system, and let him know he could wait in the reception area.
On the day of the appointment, Daniel's anxiety caused him to misplace the address, requiring a quick text to confirm. Due to subway delays, his stress escalated, though he still arrived 20 minutes early. For safety and confidentiality, the door between my waiting room and inner office remains locked so current sessions are never interrupted.
Forgetting that I would be with another client until our exact start time, Daniel began calling out anxiously in the reception room. I paused my session briefly to greet him warmly, assure him he was in the right place, and let him know I would be right with him.
When I opened the door at our scheduled time, Daniel was visibly sweating and shaking. He sat down, but within moments, he panicked. He stated he forgot an urgent phone call, bolted from the office, and left the building in a state of panic. I followed up with him later that evening with a message.
During our next scheduled session, Daniel was still anxious, but he was able to openly discuss his fears of being judged or exposed. 
By encouraging him to voice his doubts, Daniel gradually began to settle into the therapeutic alliance. His anxiety did not vanish overnight, but by staying in the chair, he learned that the therapy room was a space built to hold his ambivalence safely.
About Josephine Ferraro, LCSW
👤 Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist & Trauma Specialist
I am a licensed NYC psychotherapist with 25+ years of experience. 
I have helped many individual adults and couples over the years.
I see clients in person in my office in Greenwich Village, Manhattan, NYC (10011). 
Online therapy are available throughout New York State.
I offer a free 15-minute phone call before setting up an initial appointment.
I am an advanced practitioner in EMDR, AEDP, IFS, Somatic Experiencing, Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples and I am a Certified Sex Therapist.
Contact Information
📞 Call: (917) 742-2624 (during business hours)













Monday, February 8, 2016

Overcoming Anticipatory Anxiety

In a prior article, How to Stop Worrying, I addressed a concern that many chronic worriers have.  In this article, I'm addressing a specific type of worrying, which is called anticipatory anxiety.


Overcoming Anticipatory Anxiety

Many people struggle with anticipatory anxiety, which is worrying about something in advance of it occurring.

The thing that you're worried about is something that may or may not occur at some point in the future.

Anticipatory anxiety isn't an anxiety disorder.  It's part of different types of anxiety disorders, including generalized anxiety, panic attacks, posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and other forms of anxiety.

What Are the Symptoms of Anticipatory Anxiety?
Symptoms can include:
  • excessive worrying
  • insomnia
  • muscle aches
  • nausea
  • headaches
  • hyperventilation
  • feelings of dread
  • overeating
  • gastrointestinal problems
  • panic attacks
When, Why and How Does Anticipatory Anxiety Occur?
Anticipatory anxiety can occur at any time and for many people it's a chronic condition.

Anticipatory anxiety can include worrying in advance of anything being wrong about money, job loss, problems in a relationship or any other event or situation that hasn't occurred yet.

The fact that it hasn't occurred yet is key--it is the anticipation that something bad will happen.  It's not necessarily based on anything objective that is going on now.

Anticipatory anxiety can occur based on your past, including early childhood experiences.

For instance, if you grew up in a home that was chaotic where your parents were constantly worried about real and imagined problems, you can grow up feeling that the world isn't a safe place and, generally, anything that can go wrong will go wrong in your life as an adult.  This can develop into generalized anxiety disorder.

Many people who suffer with anticipatory anxiety are unaware that they have become accustomed to this habitual way of worrying.  Their habit of worrying has become automatic.

If you had significant trauma that has resulted in your developing posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), you might respond to many events or situations in your life as if they will result in catastrophe (see my article:  Are You Catastrophizing?)

There is no differentiation between traumatic events and normal non-traumatic life events.

How to Overcome Anticipatory Anxiety?
Here are some tips that might be helpful to you:
  • Rather than allowing your thoughts to run away with you, make a conscious effort to step back from worrying and question whether the things you're worrying about are likely to happen.
  • Ask yourself if you're okay now (as opposed to your worries about the future).
  • Think about all the other times when you worried about something and things turned out well.
  • Distract yourself from your worries by focusing on something else.
  • Talk to a friend or loved one to get a better perspective.
Getting Help in Therapy
The tips outlined above work for some people.

Many other people, who try to deal with their anticipatory anxiety on their own find that they need the help of a professional mental health professional, especially if their problems are longstanding and ingrained.

A licensed psychotherapist can help you to get to the root of the problem that causes you to have anticipatory anxiety.

Rather than suffering on your own, with the help of a licensed therapist, you can overcome this problem so you can lead a more fulfilling life.

About Me
I am a licensed NYC psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR and Somatic Experiencing therapist who works with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website:  Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.