NYC Psychotherapist Blog

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Tuesday, October 26, 2021

Sexual Wellness: How to Access Your Sexual Energy

Your sexual energy is your life force.  After all, you were conceived as a result of sexual energy. So, knowing how to access this energy can give you a sense of aliveness, regardless of whether or not you have a partner (see my articles: Sexual Pleasure and Developing the Erotic Self - Part 1Part 2 and Women's Sexuality: Tips For Sexual Discovery).

Sexual Wellness: How to Access Your Sexual Energy

Suggestions For Accessing Your Sexual Energy
Here are several ways to access your sexual energy--even if you've been out of touch with it for a while:
  • Connect to Your 5 Senses: Your five senses include what you see, hear, smell, feel (touch) and taste.  By engaging your senses in pleasurable ways, you can come alive sensuously and sexually.  This can include tasting delicious food, smelling your favorite scent, listening to your favorite music, and so on.
  • Move: Exercise and dance can be pleasurable ways to access your sexual energy. These activities can connect you to your deepest energy.  When you feel the beat of the music, it can connect you to your heartbeat.  As you move,  you can feel the rhythm of the music, which makes you come alive to your senses, including your erotic sense.  To access sexual energy through exercise, you can try: glut bridges, plank, Kegels, pigeon pose and so on (always consult with your medical doctor before you begin an exercise program).
  • Make Sounds: Humming, singing, chanting and making other sounds that vibrate in your body is another good way to connect with your sexual energy.  
  • Try Self Pleasure: Touch yourself in ways that feel pleasurable to you.  If you're uncomfortable with masturbating, you can enliven your sensuous self by doing simple things like taking a bubble bath or massaging yourself with your favorite lotion or oil after you shower.  You can also use sex toys (if you feel comfortable) to connect with your sexual energy.  You might need to experiment with the type of toys that feel right to you.
  • Get a Sensual Massage: Touch is so important, and a relaxing massage can help to reconnect you to your body, especially your erogenous zones like the nape of your neck, your scalp, behind your knees, your earlobes, your buttocks and genitals, and your feet--to name the most common erogenous zones.  You might also discover additional erogenous zones that enlive you.  Whether you massage yourself with massage oil or a partner gives you a sensual massage, this kind of touch is healing and can also help you to access your sexual energy.  
Overcoming Psychological Issues That Inhibit Your Sexual Energy
Sometimes unresolved trauma can inhibit or block your sexual energy.  Whether this was the result of sexual abuse, anxiety or familial or cultural taboos, a trauma therapist who uses Experiential Therapy can help you to overcome the problems that are keeping you blocked (see my article: Why Experiential Psychotherapy is More Effective Than Talk Therapy to Overcome Trauma).

Getting Help in Therapy
If you have been feeling disconnected from yourself emotionally or physically, you can get help from a licensed mental health professional who uses the mind-body connection in therapy (see my article: What is a Trauma Therapist?).

Rather than struggling on your own, seek help.  

Resolving the problems that keep you blocked can free you from your history and reconnect you to your vitality.

About Me
I am a licensed NYC psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR, AEDP, EFT and Somatic Experiencing therapist.

I work with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website: Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist.

To set up a consultation, call me at (917) 742-2624 during business hours or email me.