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Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Who Are You Carrying Around Inside Your Head?

I'm currently reading The Man Within My Head by Pico Iyer.  He writes about his explorations of the life and works of the English writer, Graham Greene.  Iyer talks about feeling like he's carrying Greene in his head and how this affects him.  The Man Within My Head is a poignant look at Iyer's self exploration as he ponders whether the man he feels he carries in his head is Greene or if it is actually his own father.

Who Are You Carrying Around Inside Your Head?

The Experience of Carrying Someone in Your Head:  Dreams, Coincidence, Synchronicities
As I've been reading this book, it brought to mind how often all of us, at various times, carry around certain people in our heads--whether it's a cherished departed relative, friend, mentor, teacher, former therapist, author or other people who have affected us on a deep level.

My own experience has been that when I am immersed in a memoir or biography of someone that I especially admire, I often have vivid dreams about that person.

I also have the sense, as Pico Iyer describes, of carrying this person around in my head.  Then, aside from my dreams, I have wonderful experiences where I'll happen upon this person's name or some other significant factor about them in my daily activities.

Coincidence or synchronicity?  Who knows.  But it adds to the intensity of the immersion experience.

Seeing Through the Eyes of the Person in Your Head
It's not unusual for people to want to see through the eyes of someone who is important to them or who has affected them deeply.  I've heard therapy clients as well as people in my personal life also describe similar experiences.

Sometimes, therapy clients who have been seeing me for a while tell me that when they're in a particularly challenging situation, they try to think of what I might say to them.  This is a common experience for clients in therapy.  It helps them in that moment and gives them a sense of objectivity.  It also helps them to feel they're not alone with in whatever dilemma they're going through.

In the meantime, I recommend The Man Within My Head by Pico Iyer, who writes about his own experience in an eloquent and moving way.

I am a licensed NYC psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, EMDR and Somatic Experiencing therapist who works with individual adults and couples.

To find out more about me, visit my website:  Josephine Ferraro, LCSW - NYC Psychotherapist

To set up a consultation, call me at (212) 726-1006 or email me:

photo credit: Loving Earth via photopin cc

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